Is Oral Sex Between A Married Couple Wrong? Let's Find Out What The Bible Says

No where does the Bible forbid it or discuss it. There is no biblical evidence that it is a sin against God for a husband and wife to express love for each other in this way. Even the book of Leviticus, which mentions many Old Testament sex-related prohibitions and rules for the Israelites, never mentions it. We see no reason to believe that expressing affection for one's mate in this way is forbidden or would necessarily harm one's walk with God.

We are aware that some have tried to make a biblical issue out of what parts of the body a married couple can and cannot kiss. In their minds, there is only only one biblical form of sexual expression in marriage, sexual intercourse. They attempt to defend their viewpoint on biblical grounds—trying to make it into a holiness issue. However, no where do we see Scripture putting such limits on the sexual relationship of a godly husband and wife, even Levitical priests (who were forbidden to do many things).

Most knowledgeable and spiritually mature Christians realize that God is the author of sex and love, and every part and sensation of the human body, and that He intended the relationship between husband and wife to be loving, sensuous, joyful, creative and full of pleasure.

The Bible does speak to us about our sexual conduct in general terms, and these principles should guide us.

First, the Bible is clear that our bodies are not our own, and that we are to glorify God with our bodies (see 1 Corinthians 6:12-20; 10:31). Our sexual conduct in marriage should glorify God.

Second, the Bible instructs that we are not to deprive our mates of sex, and that our bodies (in a sense) belong to our mate (1 Corinthians 7:3-5).

Third, sexual practices that are “contrary to nature” are forbidden (Romans 1:26-27). Homosexuality is the most obvious – and clearly condemned — example.

Fourth, our sanctification involves a different sexual ethic and practice than that of the unbelieving world (1 Thessalonians 4:1-8; note especially verse 5). 

Fifth, the husband is to live with his wife in an understanding way, or as the NET Bible puts it, “treat your wives with consideration” (1 Peter 3:7). This consideration should surely include what satisfies and stimulates his wife, and what is offensive.

Sixth, all Christians are to live together in a spirit of humility, practicing servanthood – not seeking our own interests, but the interests of others (Philippians 2:1ff.). Surely this would imply (if not clearly indicate) that the husband should seek the sexual fulfillment/satisfaction of his wife, as the wife should do for her husband. But when a particular practice is offensive to one, I would think that the other should not pursue it. The husband is to seek the purification of his wife (Ephesians 5:25-27).

I believe we should avoid every sexual practice that is clearly forbidden in the word of God, and that we should enjoy the freedom God gives to us in other matters, subject to the governing principles stated above and our conscience. It seems to me that in the particular issues you have raised, the husband has “liberty” (in his mind) to practice oral sex, and the wife does not. 

Even if her reticence is a matter of preference, I think the husband should honor it. (On the other hand, if it is only a matter of preference, the wife may choose to accommodate her husband, for his pleasure.) But if the wife has a guilty conscience about this matter, then the husband should not use either his authority or his need for sexual pleasure to compel his wife to practice oral sex, and thus to sin (Romans 14:23). Neither should he argue with her about this matter, seeking to change her mind (Romans 14:1-8, 19, 22). 

What do you think? Share your thoughts with others...

Photo credit: Madamnoire


  1. Relating sexual styles, methods or 100 ways to have sex to the holy bible, I personally feel its repulsive. The Bible is no kama Sutra guide and I feel this is just a cheap shot to bring people to your site. I wonder why you haven't seeked the KORAN out for reference, perhaps you were smart enough to know your site would easily be bombarded with cyber hackers and most likely shut down. I don't think this is funny or amusing, rather insultive and condescending to all Christians


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